Margot and Social Media: They should make a blog of regular ‘dirty text conversation starters’ that you can pull form when you have dirty text writers block.
Emilee and D.A.R.E: So D.A.R.E doesn’t stand for Drugs Are Really Expensive?
Apple on Technology: FaceTime is such a meaningless step between normal phone calls and hologram phone calls.
I Give Grant a Compliment
Me: Grant, you look like a male librarian.
Grant: I’m a male-arian.
Chris on Anatomy: Foreskin…nature’s rubik cube.
Kelsey in Middle School: I used to be really into witchcraft. I had books.
Meredith Comments on my Obsession with Instagram ::In Brandy Voice:I can’t find the right instagram photo filter. First world problems.
Casey’s First Back Massage
ME: Twain, how was your first back massage?
CASEY: It was awful. It was like the hand job of back massages.
Brion Watches His First Ass Clapping Video: What’s hitting what?
Betsy & Neil on Compromise
Neil: Betsy do you want me to kick your ass now or later?
Betsy: Later Please.
